Queen of Drama

Have I ever told you that I don't like school. I have a bad feeling that this semester is going to be really hard. I am taking biology and 2 business classes. I'm in over my head. I am going to start working on all my homework this weekend. I try to make a point not to make any plans for the weekends when I'm in school so that I am able to get my homework done then. There is just too much other stuff that goes on during the week.

G is in volleyball and has practice everyday after school til 5. Her games start next week and are on Tuesdays and Thursdays and some Wednesdays, so there goes those nights. I am putting angel boy in soccer this year so twice a week he will have practice, but his dad has agreed to help me out with that. I don't mind doing it, I just worry that they will both have practice and/or game on the same day. Adam will most likely be able to pick G up but there are days he works late.

Back to the story of my mother....

So G was supposed to come back the following Saturday night. So me being me I went out and got trashed the Friday before. Something you should know is that angel boy goes with his dad almost every weekend, so up until now I have had my weekends off. So I wanted one more night that belonged to just me. Needless to say I drank way to much and felt like shit all day and night on Saturday. I asked my mother to go pick her up from her friends house and bring her to mine. So she did, she got to my house about 6 and left 5 minutes later. She said she had to get home, M was waiting for her. Um OK??

The following Monday mom calls and says that the school that G had been going to had called and told her that since she was out of district she was no longer able to attend due to a high enrollment that year. OK so now what the fuck am I supposed to do. I was in a totally different district than my mom or the school G had been going to. To make a very long story kind of short.. I spent the entire week trying to get her into the school that was in my district. I had to get her name added to my lease, we had to go to court and start proceedings for guardianship because I had no authority to enroll her in school. Had a huge fight with the school district because they thought we were doing this to avoid her going to the school that was by my mom's. Which really is a shitty school district, but um hello, she lives with me. Why in the hell would I drive 30 minutes everyday to get her to school and then how was I supposed to pick her up, leave work early? I think not. So they made my mother write a letter and explain why my sister was living with me and not her. Finally, they let her attend that school. We had registration that next day, Friday and school started Monday. I had missed almost the entire week of work because I was driving back and forth to schools and the court house. I had to pay the filing fee for the guardianship which was almost $200 bucks plus had to get an ad in the paper to try and find her dad that cost $65. I had to pay all of her registration fees, PE uniform, yearbook, planner, lunch money... and all her school supplies, school clothes and shoes. Do you think that my mom offered to give me a fucking dime?? Nope and I spent almost a thousand dollars in a matter of a couple days. I wouldn't mind doing it, but I was at the time a single income house with a 3 year old already and why do you have no money, you and your husband both work.

The next few months went by without any drama. My mother despite only living a half hour away, never came to my house to visit her. Not once!

Adam and I had gotten back together and decided that if we were going to make this work we needed to get a bigger place. We found the house we are currently in at the beginning of December. Each of the kids would have their own room. We were all very excited. I had finally text my mom and told her that she needed to start giving me money because I needed help with buying G new winter clothes and new bedroom furniture, bedding, etc. So she says that she could try and give me $25 dollars a week. Now this is nothing seeing as how I am raising your child, but up until now she had not given my a dime to help out. She pays her cell phone bill and that's it. So I would take what I could get. The very next day she calls and says that she could only give me the $25 dollars every other week when M gets paid. Um alright. So you want to know how many times I saw that 25 bucks, zero, zilch, nada!!!

Now I need to state for the record that this women has a job. She works and brings home about $1200 a month. M, after taxes and child support payments brings home like $800 dollars a month. They do not pay rent and have no car payments. They have car insurance, utility bills, phone, cell phone, and 2 credit cards. Added all up and it is no more than 7 or 8 hundred bucks a month. So what is it that they spend their money on? Good question, they should still have the money my mom brings home left over. She bitches all the time that they don't have money to buy food or gas. So as far as I can tell they spend it on alcohol and cig.

So needless to say G got all the stuff she needed for her room, furniture, bedding, and some new winter clothes. I didn't really need her to give me the money to help me out, I acted like I needed it more than anything just to see if she would actually help out. Guess I got my answer.

So I guess my biggest issue is that they have no fucking bills and no kids. We have a shit load of bills and 2 kids and we can pay for the shit so why can't she help out. We can manage to have a nice house and nice cars and everyone has clothes and food. I just have a hard time understanding how you make the decisions that you do being as old as you are.

Recently my mother has been having female medical problems. This is something that is a little scary but it is common. It's taken about 6 months to get a diagnosis, and she will have surgery in September to have a hysterectomy and have her muscles sewn back up. It pisses me off because she has known for months that she would have to have surgery and more than likely be off work for at least 6 weeks and has done nothing to help out her situation. She still spends their money on bullshit. She has nothing saved up to help out when shes off work. And now she's started to give me the guilt trip about not having the money to pay for G's cell phone. This is the one thing you do for the kid, give me $60 bucks a month to pay her cell phone and your trying to get out of that too.

I have to tell you even though I make it sound so, she is not an alcoholic. If she was I would understand a little bit more when she tells me she has no money or she missed work because she was hung over. My mom has been a partier off and on my whole life but it is something she can control. When she left M a couple years ago and had her own place she made it on her own just fine, no bitching about no money and she didn't spend it on alcohol. I know she is capable of taking care of herself but it pisses me off that she chooses not to.

Another problem I have had lately is no matter what shit she has pulled, I never stay mad at her and I never say anything to her. Regardless she is still my mother. I feel sorry for her. Lately it has been getting to me though. She calls and pretends its to find out how we are all doing and before you can even answer her she goes into how bad her life sucks. I don't know how to handle this anymore. I live 5 minutes from her work and have lived there for 8 months, she has been to my house once. She bailed out of G's birthday dinner because she had to get home because M was getting off work soon. I think that she has seen G a total of 6 times in the 13 months she has lived with me. Five of those times is because I have either gone to her house( 1 time ) or gone to my grandfathers ( 4 times ). Other than the money she gives me to pay for the cell phone, I have never received any money to help out nor has she given G money for anything.

My mother called me the Sunday before last, the 12th(my birthday) and told me that she would deposit $30 the following Friday in my bank to do what ever I wanted with it, spend on G or take it for myself. So that Friday rolls around and she didn't go to work because she was sick or hungover but whatever, she would give it to me Monday, but it would probably only be $20. So this Sunday she calls and tells me about her weekend, they drank all night and M was drunk, blah blah blah. She says she will deposit my money the next day but now it's only going to be $10 because she just didn't have anymore than that. So today is Thursday, I have not heard from her or seen the money. I really just want to tell her to shove it up her ass. I have budgeted in G's cell phone money so that I no longer need to count on her to give it to me.

This is not just a money thing with her. G told her the weekend that she was playing volleyball and she says, "well I don't have a car so I couldn't go anyway". Um, what is it that you drive to work everyday, that would be a car you dumbass. Mind you the air conditioner does not work, it is still a car. It takes 5 minutes to get from your work to her school. So I text my brother and my mom yesterday to let them know her first game is next Tuesday. I hear back from my brother 10 minutes later, he will be there. Still haven't heard from my mom. Funny huh??

I want to thank everyone who has left great comments on the last post about my mother. It means alot to me. I want to let you know that I am not posting all of this for anyone to feel sorry for me or anything like that. I do what I can and I am not perfect, but damn I try :). I just need someone else to vent to about my mom. I am at a lose for what to do anymore. I want to tell her how I feel, but I don't think it would do anything. What do you guys think? What would you do if you were me? Thanks for listening or uh reading.

Hope you have a great day!!